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1… Seeing projects with beautiful usage of materials always frustrates me that our clients are too cheap to do anything other than pre-engineered metal frames, gypsum board and “cultured” stone. Nobody’s fault but our own, we invite them to use us.

2… It’s also depressing to get on “my store” at Amazon.com and wonder what happened to all those books I had to buy for college. I hope they’re still out there somewhere. Is it abnormal to miss textbooks?

3… The worst soul sucker of the day thus far, however, was going to UDF earlier and seeing the woman from the architecture firm down the street (I think I’m crushing…) dressed super-stylishly and looking so hot – and not having any “in” to talk to her. Then immediately reading in Architectural Record about Toyo Ito’s new project , and wishing that there was any chance in my current life that I could ever work on something that astounding and interesting. Beauty gave me a 1-2 punch that cut pretty deep. But now it’s time to get back to the constant pressure of making some spec house piece of shit to make some rich developer even richer.

4… Sometimes salvation rides a pale horse, too. I feel on the verge of some immolation that will have to be overcome, one that will make me stronger and change the terms of this “worklife at a small midwestern architecture firm.” But I hope that the thing that does it is simple word substitution of “california” for “midwestern.” The deathmarch daily draws closer to its conclusion.

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